fantasy

Saga: Volume Two by Brian K. Vaughan · Fiona Staples – Comic Book Review

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Saga: Volume Two by Brian K. Vaughan · Fiona Staples - Comic Book cover

Well, if you thought Brian K. Vaughan slowed down the pace for the second installment of Saga, then you’re mistaken. The two enamoured deserters from Landfall and Wreath’s galaxy wide war continue their rampage – now accompanied by the mama-in-law and papa-in-law of the new mother. The introduction isn’t exactly smooth sailing, but who can resist melting at the sight of a brand new grandchild – especially when they see the horn buds on the little one’s noggin.

The mother-in-law blasted baby Hazel’s new, ghost-babysitter (with her dangling out intestines) out of the game at the end of the previous installment – and you couldn’t help but lament what a loss it was. She was such a cool character. Well, what can we say, she’s not the only one flying into the void.

Of course, there are new characters to fill the gaps left behind, (though it’s obvious that The Stalk can NEVER be replaced). For instance, seeing Marko’s ex-fiancee, you seriously ponder how this dull ass swapped out that gorgeous, fiery chocolate baby for this not-so-morally-solid current wife. (Well, probably because he’s a dull ass.) Gwendolyn would have GUARANTEED you’d never be bored for a second with her. Although, hm, it’ll probably work out with Alana too, at least until she gets bored of him…

You won’t miss shocking twists either, in fact, it feels like they may have overdone it with the story’s twisting this time around, a slightly slower pace might have suited the story better. Although you might think so just because you can reach the end of this slender volume in moments, which is a few pages shorter than its predecessor.

However, Prince Robot IV. is – now confirmed! – a genuine douchebag. Well, so that no human feeling gets caught in his circuits! Hopefully, someone will smash his screen in the next installment!

What you noticeably encounter less of compared to the first volume is the in-your-face primary sexual characteristics. (That’s right, maybe in the next volume.) Until then – even if quantity doesn’t make up for quality – presumably, Fard’s not-too-trustworthy testicles will hover in your mind’s eye.

8/10

Saga: Volume Two by Brian K. Vaughan & Fiona Staples
144 pages, Paperback
Published in 2013 by Image Comics

(Saga: Volume Two collects: Saga #7-12.)

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Review of the previous volume:
Saga: Volume One

Robin Hood (2010) – Film Review

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Robin Hood (2010) movie poster

Robin Hood (2010) – Film Review

Ridley Scott’s 2010 creation is, without a doubt, the most baffling Robin Hood movie ever made (yes, including Men in Tights), which, after a reasonably well-executed opening battle scene, quickly devolves into a weird, multi-threaded mess:

Warning: major spoilers ahead! But honestly—don’t worry about it.

—Robin Hood Steals, Cheats – and Plants Wheat

Robin Hood, the SIMPLE ARCHER, under the alias of Sir Loxley, ends up delivering King Richard the Lionheart’s crown to the Queen Mother (but only by accident, because he and his bros GOT HAMMERED while sailing and forget to make a run for it).

Then Robin, the SIMPLE ARCHER, using the Sir Loxley alias, infiltrates the Loxley family, and at this point the story turns into The Taming of the Shrew, with the understandably reluctant Lady Marion (who, by the way, spends her free time ploughing, sowing, and reaping alongside peasants, and feels an irresistible urge to personally drag the common folk’s goats out of the muck.).

Robin, the SIMPLE ARCHER, secretly sows the grain he EXTORTED from Friar Tuck — in the DEAD OF NIGHT.

The Martial Arts Masters of Sherwood Forest

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Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo – Book Review

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Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo - Book cover

Could Six of Crows be both a fantasy and a heist novel? Yup! The toughest guy in the docks gets hired for a mission that spans across countries. The target? A scientist whose invention boosts magic users’ powers exponentially—only to burn them out just as fast. Sounds… not ideal.

Assemble the Crew

The first part of Six of Crows is all about putting the team together. And this is where Bardugo’s novel really shines. The characters are unique and memorable—hey there, Kaz, Nina, and Ghost! And the setting, Ketterdam’s slums, feels like a twisted version of an old Dutch city that might still exist today. (Limburg maybe? Or Utrecht? Can’t say for sure.)

Wait, They’re All Teenagers?

Now, here’s where things get a little weird: all the main characters are teenagers. To pull in the YA crowd? Probably. Or maybe I just hadn’t realized I was reading a YA fantasy until now. (Entirely possible.) But Bardugo’s plan doesn’t really work, because the human brain, that lovely self-correcting machine, just automatically bumps their ages up past 20. Because, let’s be honest, it’s impossible to believe that a bunch of 15–17-year-olds could be this professional, this good, at so many things.

Stir Crazy! (Jailhouse Nonsense)

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Blood Will Follow by Snorri Kristjansson – Book Review

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Blood Will Follow by Snorri Kristjansson - Book Cover

In the Name of Christ – with an Axe

King Olav Tryggvason has decided to unite all of Norway in the holy name of Christ. And anyone unwilling to share his faith is going to get a good solid whack on the head with an axe. The various plot threads all come together beneath the walls of the city of Stenvik, where a bunch of old-school Vikings dissenters — stubbornly clinging to their traditional, low-maintenance religion — are planning to whack King Olav on the head right back, also with an axe. So yeah—forget the word of Christ. Blood Will follow.

The first book in Snorri Kristjansson’s trilogy, Swords of Good Men, was a pretty decent historical novel — though you might’ve lost your enthusiasm a bit with the overload of hard-to-tell-apart characters, the constant switching of points of view, and the somewhat clumsy start to the plot. Luckily, during the siege, the story picked up steam. Though the inclusion of fantasy-style blood magic in an otherwise historically grounded novel might have caused a few readers to raise an eyebrow.

Everything Clashes With Everything Else

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Saga: Volume One by Brian K. Vaughan · Fiona Staples – Comic Book Review

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Saga: Volume One by Brian K. Vaughan · Fiona Staples - comic book cover

Everything is shit

“Am I shitting? It feels like I’m shitting!”

With these immortal words, the Saga comic series by Brian K. Vaughan and Fiona Staples kicks off—in the middle of a childbirth scene, no less. If your immediate reaction is to think, “Maybe this is trying to shock me,” well, you wouldn’t be wrong… But hey, it’s the 21st century, so who doesn’t give a FUCK? who doesn’t give a GOOD GODDAMN?

That said, I wouldn’t exactly recommend the Saga comic to prudes in good conscience, as this is far from the ONLY instance like this.

For example, you’ll encounter dangling male genitalia more than once, swinging in all its glory. Then, you’ll visit a brothel planet and stumble straight into a full-blown orgy. Later, you’ll meet a character with more legs than arms and more eyes than ears. And at this point, you might start doubting yourself: could it be, purely by chance, that you’re just a tad bit twisted for thinking this bizarre creature is sexy as hell…?

But oh yes, it’s entirely possible!

(Oh, and she spends every one of her scenes rocking a monokini. So, if you didn’t already know what arachnophilia is, you’re about to find out.)

And yet, all of this is still not the point.

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The Traitor God by Cameron Johnston – Book Review

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The Traitor God by Cameron Johnston - Book Cover

The protagonist of Traitor God, the mage Edrin Walker, returns to his hometown of Setharis after 10 years of exile to avenge the death of his best—and only (!)—friend. It’s fair to say Setharis doesn’t exactly welcome him back with open arms. After all, he did kill a god there. Or so people say. He doesn’t remember doing it. Then again, you’d probably claim the same thing in his shoes, wouldn’t you?

Cameron Johnston’s debut novel features an unusual hero, a unique magic system, and a genre experiment that’s anything but conventional: a blend of dark fantasy, detective noir, and horror-thriller elements.

Edrin Walker is NOT Your Friend

Edrin Walker is the walking embodiment of self-destruction. He’s a drunk, a rule-breaker, and a foul-mouthed, unpleasant jerk who despises himself far more than he could ever despise anyone else. Yet, it quickly becomes clear that Edrin possesses what is arguably the coolest magical ability around. And yet… maybe not.

Being able to peek into other people’s minds? That’s handy, especially if you want to insult them with flair. But invading someone’s mind? That’s a whole other level. Edrin is a telepath who can take complete control over others’ minds. Unfortunately, Setharis has a bit of a history with mind-mages. So, here’s the general consensus:

#1. Blowing someone to bits or peeling their skin off with magic? Fine.
#2. Turning people into mindless puppets? Absolutely not fine.

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Doctor Strange (2016) – Film – Review

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Doctor Strange (2016)

As we all know, Marvel movies are like theme parks. And Doctor Strange (2016) is no exception to Martin Scorsese’s fundamental critique: colorful, dazzling, magical—but still riddled with plenty of holes.

The good Doctor Strange is forced into a career change due to a car accident (and it can’t be stressed enough: DON’T USE YOUR PHONE WHILE DRIVING!). From hotshot surgeon to sorcerer. Of course, it’s not quite that simple. For one, like the majority of Marvel movies, this one’s an origin story. And two, becoming a sorcerer isn’t exactly an overnight process.

Meanwhile, the main character, played by Benedict Cumberbatch, doesn’t do much to win our sympathy. After all, who actually likes a smug, egotistical, materialistic, narcissistic, and arrogant surgeon? No one. Except, maybe, if you need that person to perform your appendectomy. In that case, you might be a bit more forgiving…

Career Crash and Redemption

If you have a body part that’s vital to your work, losing its functionality can turn your whole life upside down. No wonder Dr. Stephen Strange struggles to deal with the situation. What would you do in his shoes? Would you say, “Time heals all wounds!” and patiently go through your physical therapy sessions while casually earning a dermatology certificate on the side?

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Locke ​& Key Master Edition 1. by Joe Hill · Gabriel Rodriguez – Comic Book Review

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Locke ​& Key Master Edition 1. (Locke & Key 1-2.) by Joe Hill · Gabriel Rodriguez

The Lockes and Keys: A Dangerous Combination

After the tragic death of her husband, Nina Locke moves back to her late spouse’s childhood home, Keyhouse, in Lovecraft, Massachusetts, along with her three children. However, as it turns out, the protagonists of Joe Hill and Gabriel Rodriguez’s Locke & Key couldn’t have chosen a worse place to start over. (And let’s be honest, even the town’s name isn’t exactly promising.)

Keyhouse is an incredibly dangerous place. The members of the Locke family share a supernatural connection with the house, which harbors countless secrets. Scattered around the house—or carefully hidden—are various keys that unlock doors leading to unexpected destinations. Some open physical spaces (think something mundane, like our dear Aunt Maggie’s pantry), while others provide access to far more extraordinary places—like inside someone’s BRAIN. There’s even a key that separates your soul from your body.

But with these keys, the Locke kids could also accidentally summon creatures straight from hell if they’re not careful.

So, yeah, best to handle these keys with care!

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