medieval

The Empty Throne By Bernard Cornwell – Book Review

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The Empty Throne By Bernard Cornwell - Book Cover

The Saxon Stories, Cornwell’s historical novel series (and his most successful work), has now reached its eighth installment. The story continues with The Empty Throne, narrating the creation of unified England – a tale filled with the clang of weapons. The series, which began with the early years of King Alfred’s reign in the last quarter of the 9th century, has long followed the same recipe:

British kingdoms teetering on the brink of collapse under the pressure of Norwegian-Danish migrants, evolving into permanent no-go zones; the increasingly powerful Catholic Church; and Uthred, who, despite wanting nothing more than to reclaim his god-damn, stolen family inheritance, finds himself shouldering the weight of a nation’s survival. Again. And again. And again.

And this recipe works again and again – as it does in the case of The Empty Throne, thanks to meticulous preparation, an effortless yet pleasant writing style, and above all, Bernard Cornwell’s endearing, infinitely relaxed protagonist (who learned this attitude from the fine, cheerful, and also bloodthirsty Vikings who raised him.)

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Robin Hood (2010) – Film Review

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Robin Hood (2010) movie poster

Robin Hood (2010) – Film Review

Ridley Scott’s 2010 creation is, without a doubt, the most baffling Robin Hood movie ever made (yes, including Men in Tights), which, after a reasonably well-executed opening battle scene, quickly devolves into a weird, multi-threaded mess:

Warning: major spoilers ahead! But honestly—don’t worry about it.

—Robin Hood Steals, Cheats – and Plants Wheat

Robin Hood, the SIMPLE ARCHER, under the alias of Sir Loxley, ends up delivering King Richard the Lionheart’s crown to the Queen Mother (but only by accident, because he and his bros GOT HAMMERED while sailing and forget to make a run for it).

Then Robin, the SIMPLE ARCHER, using the Sir Loxley alias, infiltrates the Loxley family, and at this point the story turns into The Taming of the Shrew, with the understandably reluctant Lady Marion (who, by the way, spends her free time ploughing, sowing, and reaping alongside peasants, and feels an irresistible urge to personally drag the common folk’s goats out of the muck.).

Robin, the SIMPLE ARCHER, secretly sows the grain he EXTORTED from Friar Tuck — in the DEAD OF NIGHT.

The Martial Arts Masters of Sherwood Forest

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Blood Will Follow by Snorri Kristjansson – Book Review

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Blood Will Follow by Snorri Kristjansson - Book Cover

In the Name of Christ – with an Axe

King Olav Tryggvason has decided to unite all of Norway in the holy name of Christ. And anyone unwilling to share his faith is going to get a good solid whack on the head with an axe. The various plot threads all come together beneath the walls of the city of Stenvik, where a bunch of old-school Vikings dissenters — stubbornly clinging to their traditional, low-maintenance religion — are planning to whack King Olav on the head right back, also with an axe. So yeah—forget the word of Christ. Blood Will follow.

The first book in Snorri Kristjansson’s trilogy, Swords of Good Men, was a pretty decent historical novel — though you might’ve lost your enthusiasm a bit with the overload of hard-to-tell-apart characters, the constant switching of points of view, and the somewhat clumsy start to the plot. Luckily, during the siege, the story picked up steam. Though the inclusion of fantasy-style blood magic in an otherwise historically grounded novel might have caused a few readers to raise an eyebrow.

Everything Clashes With Everything Else

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