Chloé Esposito’s book screams “girly nonsense” from a mile away. “Chick lit”— it gently implies that we’re not exactly dealing with the pinnacles of literary achievement here. So, what’s it doing on this SOPHISTICATED blog, you ask? That is mad! Fate must have had it in for me when the second volume of this esteemed trilogy landed in my hands. I skimmed through, and bam!—a line popped out at me: something, well, very sexual. Alas, I can’t remember a single word of it.
So, Mad promises an unusual and unpredictable adventure (since I don’t normally read this kind of nonsense) in my frenzied search for that lucky sentence—a quest that doubles as an opportunity to write a nice, snarky review. Let’s go!
Chloé Esposito: Grandmaster of Character Building!
Then, what happens? Right from the start of Mad, you’re face-to-face with a MASTERCLASS in character building! In the first two chapters, here’s what we learn about our heroine, the lovely Alvina: she’s lazy, messy, irresponsible, shallow, jealous, greedy, selfish, a drunk, and promiscuous. Oh, and she’s a pyromaniac too! On the other side of the scales? Just two lonely items: she likes to read and writes haikus. Truly a joy, this kind of protagonist.
One more surprise awaits you with Esposito’s book: humor. I’m not really the laugh-out-loud type, but I laughed out loud three times while reading the first two chapters. And twice more in the third. It’s all like a stand-up comedy mixed with a big dose of silliness.
A Romance Novel with a Sociopathic Heroine
That’s about where the good news ends. And where the intro of Mad wraps up. After that, I didn’t laugh anymore, and you probably won’t either, even though similar jokes pop up here and there. The main reason is that it becomes glaringly obvious that Alvina, besides her lovely attributes listed above, is also a sociopath, with the emotional intelligence of a nine-year-old. Armed with this mindset and a 28-centimeter vibrator, affectionately called “Mr. Dick,” she arrives in Taormina to see her rich, successful twin sister. Who promptly asks her to switch identities with her. Wow, never saw that twist coming!
From this point on, Mad is just another airy trifle. Longing for luxury items and charming Italian men. Obligatory sex scenes with partners’ growing penis sizes. (Thankfully, at least, there’s some restraint shown here—not in terms of sizes, but in that there are only about four or five of these scenes, and they’re not overwritten.)
Is Killing Fun? Sure Thing
Then another element enters the mix and takes over: the completely implausible thriller aspect (Cosa Nostra & murders), whose impact dissolves in seconds due to Alvina’s kindergarten-level approach to events. At one point in the plot, our noble heroine decides she wants to be a hitman because it sounds like fun.
And what do you think about a romantic novel whose main character is a sociopath? If you think sociopaths aren’t exactly the romantic type, you’d be spot-on! This is how you write a book that’s also an unintentionally bad parody of itself.
So why stick it out to the end?
1, Damned curiosity.
2, The author constantly tries to explain why Mad’s protagonist, Alvina is the way she is, and at the beginning, to your surprise, it sort of works, and you feel a bit of sympathy for her. But not for very long…
So, why did she turn out the way she did? Why?! Mostly because of that lousy baby formula!
Rating: 6/10
Mad (Mad Trilogy #1) by Chloé Esposito
336 pages, Hardcover
Published in 2017 by Dutton
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UPDATE:
Curiosity got the better of me, and I skimmed the second book, Bad, which immediately demolishes any trace of coherence left in the story with a twist that renders the previous book’s ending meaningless. The quality dips further (5/10), so I never did find out what that intriguing sentence was. If anyone has plowed through the sequel and still has usable brain cells, kindly post the book’s SEXIEST line here for me.
