Young Aubrey Argylle is drifting through life in Thailand, unable to break free from the paralysis caused by the double shock of his parents’ death and the truth he uncovered about them. However, fate takes an unexpected turn when the young man’s remarkably brave act catches the CIA’s attention. At the Agency, they believe Argylle would be a perfect fit.
A Spy Novel—Possibly Written by Taylor Swift. Or Maybe a Waitress…
If you haven’t been following the media frenzy surrounding the Argylle movie, you might be happily reading Elly Conway’s spy novel under the impression that it was written by an unemployed waitress. If you have, however, you might have believed for a while that the one and only Taylor Swift, queen of one-size-fits-all pop songs, dashed it off between two suspiciously identical verses. That rumor made the rounds after it was revealed that “Elly Conway” was just a pseudonym.
For me, the “written by a waitress” theory held up until about a third of the way through the book. By then, it became obvious that Argylle could only be the work of some seasoned old pro. And not just because it lacks any featherlight emotions or dramatic spats. No, the real giveaway is that the author knows way too much—about Russian domestic politics, covert operations during the Vietnam War, the internal workings of the CIA, and the current situation in the infamous opium-producing region known as the Golden Triangle.
And, well, these aren’t exactly things you’d expect a waitress to be an expert on.
Much more likely for Terry Hayes (I Am Pilgrim) and thriller writer Tammy Cohen. Argylle is their joint creation. And—at least for the most part—it’s a perfectly respectable spy novel.
The Spy Who Came in from the Heat
Thailand is already unbearably hot to begin with. But things really heat up for Aubrey Argylle when he crosses paths with a particularly ruthless drug cartel. So he figures if he wants a quieter life, he’d better join the CIA.
Argylle follows how its emotionally scarred but good-hearted protagonist integrates into one of the Agency’s elite teams. However, two things complicate this process:
First, the team is in a high-stakes race against a ruthless Russian oligarch, Vasily Fedorov, to recover a legendary historical artifact, the Amber Room. Fedorov has his sights set on power. He’s running in the presidential election and is dead certain that the far-right rabble he’s building his voter base on won’t be satisfied with just reckless promises and nationalist propaganda. No, they’ll also need magnificent artifacts to drool over…
Second, Argylle’s new friends carry a heavy burden: a past betrayal that cost the lives of their own people. So now, every new face is met with suspicion.
Spying on Emotions
The reason the assumption that Argylle was written by a female author holds up for so long is its exceptionally deep character work. Spy novels don’t usually dig this deep into their heroes’ inner turmoil and self-reflection.
Like Aubrey Argylle, Frances Coffey also undergoes thorough analysis. As the CIA’s Operations Director and the epitome of a likable boss, she is one of Argylle’s key figures. She’s the classic strict-but-fair mentor figure—the kind who makes you want to sign up for the Agency on the spot just to help make this filthy world a better place.
But Argylle also takes its time with the supporting characters. When Woody Wyatt’s teammates declare him the heart of the team, you’d probably kick this clueless fool out of the group that very instant. But then… well, you might just change your mind later… So, all in all, Terry Hayes and Tammy Cohen do a pretty solid job with the characters in their spy novel.
And throughout it all, the novel keeps the necessary dose of humor—playful banter, plenty of teasing—alongside the high-stakes action we expect from the genre.
Relentless Action—With a Side of Puzzle-Solving
Argylle is just as much about non-stop action as it is about spy games. Frances Coffey and Vasily Fedorov’s teams are in constant pursuit of each other. And when they cross paths, you can bet bullets will start flying.
Luckily, the book isn’t that predictable. It also includes classic genre elements like infiltrating high society or sneaking into a heavily guarded facility. If you’ve ever watched Alias, the early-2000s spy show set in the CIA, you know exactly what to expect. Mainly, that something always goes wrong.
Well, in Argylle, multiple things always go wrong. Not just during the action scenes—where, of course, everything that can go wrong, does—but also at a deeper level. Frances Coffey doesn’t lay all her cards on the table, and behind the surface-level mission, a second game is being played in the shadows. One with its own fair share of surprising twists.
This adds plenty of variety and excitement.
On top of all that, the book includes a complex, detective-novel-style investigation. The last time the Amber Room was seen was during the Nazi era. Then, as the Allies closed in on Germany, it vanished—just like countless other priceless artifacts.
Frances Coffey’s team follows the faintest of leads, sometimes relying on sheer luck, other times on painstaking detective work, inching ever closer to their goal. And, of course, straight into the clutches of the ruthless Russian oligarch.
Argylle Was Finished By a Waitress. Or Taylor Swift.
By now, it’s clear that Terry Hayes and Tammy Cohen did an excellent job in many areas and can claim expert-level knowledge on a range of topics. But there’s one thing neither of them seems to understand: infantry tactics.
That might sound like a minor issue, but it really isn’t. Because thanks to this one flaw, Argylle often comes across as a shockingly stupid book.
Of course, it’s also possible that at some point, a real Elly Conway—an out-of-work waitress—actually did get involved, and Hayes and Cohen were generous enough to let her handle all the scenes where the outnumbered Russians corner the CIA team. Because in those moments, the Americans consistently run away like headless chickens—usually straight into some kind of trap—just so they can grab something mere seconds before the Russians do. (Or maybe, just maybe, the divine Taylor Swift herself tinkered with the manuscript here and there. And hey, we can’t exactly expect her to nail the perfect action thriller on her first try, can we?)
But for some reason, not once does the CIA team think to take up a defensive position in an advantageous spot. Nor do they seem to realize they’ll be way worse off once the Russians inevitably catch up. And mind you, we’re talking about former members of Delta Force and Navy SEALs here—some of the most elite operatives in the U.S. military.
So it’s really hard to feel sorry for them when their own stupidity—and Elly Conway’s inexplicable laziness—leads to predictably bloody consequences.
World War 3?
Of course, it’s also worth considering the odds that Poland, as a NATO member, might just sit back and watch as Russian Navy Ka-29 attack helicopters fly into its territory. Because that’s exactly what happens in the novel Argylle. Oh, and they’re even carrying Specnaz operatives on board.
“And what about the Russian TV crew?” you might ask. Oh, don’t worry! No thriller writer would be dumb enough to cram them into the Ka-29s. Nope! They get their own Mi-8 transport helicopter.
“- War?!” – exclaims the Polish Chief of Staff, slamming his hand on the table. – “World war?!”
“Chill,” replies Elly Conway calmly.
“Alright then, let the Ruskis just shoot in the Tatras,” the Chief of Staff concurs nonchalantly. “We’ll just watch it on TV—Russia Today is broadcasting the whole thing live anyway…”
So yes, it was a catastrophic mistake to let Elly Conway write the final roughly 80 pages of Argylle. She managed to mess up everything she possibly could, and in doing so, she irreparably wrecked the work that her two co-authors had built up until that point. On top of that, she treats her readers like complete idiots—constantly.
A prime example of this is Frances Coffey’s secret game mentioned earlier, which could have been neatly wrapped up with a simple ballistics test.
But since Ms. Conway essentially just lent her name to the collaborative work, the bulk of the blame naturally falls on Terry Hayes and Tammy Cohen.
Final Score: 7.2/10
Argylle by Elly Conway
384 pages, Hardcover
Published in 2024 by Bantam
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