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Mad by Chloé Esposito – Book Review

10/24/202409/12/2021 by dr. gunga

Chloé Esposito’s book screams “girly nonsense” from a mile away. “Chick lit”— it gently implies that we’re not exactly dealing with the pinnacles of literary achievement here. So, what’s it doing on this SOPHISTICATED blog, you ask? That is mad! Fate must have had it in for me when the second volume of this esteemed trilogy landed in my hands. I skimmed through, and bam!—a line popped out at me: something, well, very sexual. Alas, I can’t remember a single word of it.

So, Mad promises an unusual and unpredictable adventure (since I don’t normally read this kind of nonsense) in my frenzied search for that lucky sentence—a quest that doubles as an opportunity to write a nice, snarky review. Let’s go!

Chloé Esposito: Grandmaster of Character Building!

Then, what happens? Right from the start of Mad, you’re face-to-face with a MASTERCLASS in character building! In the first two chapters, here’s what we learn about our heroine, the lovely Alvina: she’s lazy, messy, irresponsible, shallow, jealous, greedy, selfish, a drunk, and promiscuous. Oh, and she’s a pyromaniac too! On the other side of the scales? Just two lonely items: she likes to read and writes haikus. Truly a joy, this kind of protagonist.

One more surprise awaits you with Esposito’s book: humor. I’m not really the laugh-out-loud type, but I laughed out loud three times while reading the first two chapters. And twice more in the third. It’s all like a stand-up comedy mixed with a big dose of silliness.

A Romance Novel with a Sociopathic Heroine

That’s about where the good news ends. And where the intro of Mad wraps up. After that, I didn’t laugh anymore, and you probably won’t either, even though similar jokes pop up here and there. The main reason is that it becomes glaringly obvious that Alvina, besides her lovely attributes listed above, is also a sociopath, with the emotional intelligence of a nine-year-old. Armed with this mindset and a 28-centimeter vibrator, affectionately called “Mr. Dick,” she arrives in Taormina to see her rich, successful twin sister. Who promptly asks her to switch identities with her. Wow, never saw that twist coming!

From this point on, Mad is just another airy trifle. Longing for luxury items and charming Italian men. Obligatory sex scenes with partners’ growing penis sizes. (Thankfully, at least, there’s some restraint shown here—not in terms of sizes, but in that there are only about four or five of these scenes, and they’re not overwritten.)

Is Killing Fun? Sure Thing

Then another element enters the mix and takes over: the completely implausible thriller aspect (Cosa Nostra & murders), whose impact dissolves in seconds due to Alvina’s kindergarten-level approach to events. At one point in the plot, our noble heroine decides she wants to be a hitman because it sounds like fun.

And what do you think about a romantic novel whose main character is a sociopath? If you think sociopaths aren’t exactly the romantic type, you’d be spot-on! This is how you write a book that’s also an unintentionally bad parody of itself.

So why stick it out to the end?

1, Damned curiosity.

2, The author constantly tries to explain why Mad’s protagonist, Alvina is the way she is, and at the beginning, to your surprise, it sort of works, and you feel a bit of sympathy for her. But not for very long…

So, why did she turn out the way she did? Why?! Mostly because of that lousy baby formula!

Rating: 6/10

Mad (Mad Trilogy #1) by Chloé Esposito
336 pages, Hardcover
Published in 2017 by Dutton
—
UPDATE:
Curiosity got the better of me, and I skimmed the second book, Bad, which immediately demolishes any trace of coherence left in the story with a twist that renders the previous book’s ending meaningless. The quality dips further (5/10), so I never did find out what that intriguing sentence was. If anyone has plowed through the sequel and still has usable brain cells, kindly post the book’s SEXIEST line here for me.

Gun Island by Amitav Ghosh – Book Review

10/23/202409/09/2021 by dr. gunga

Here we go, Gun Island is one of those truly engaging reads that you can really get lost in—it’s not every day you come across a book like this. Though Amitav Ghosh’s style feels a bit reserved and occasionally odd, as if he’s only 99% comfortable with the language he’s using, the interwoven stories soon become captivating. Whenever a new character appears, you can bet the plot will immediately take a turn and wander off. Yet these digressions aren’t true detours, because sooner or later, it becomes clear that everything is connected.

The mysterious and the everyday India

Deen Datta, a New York-based bookseller, stumbles upon an Indian legend. Deen is an unlikely protagonist (okay, not quite as much as the charming Alvina in Mad by Chloé Esposito), and sometimes you’d just love to give him a smack, he’s that hopeless. It’s a peculiar authorial choice to place such an inept character at the center of events. But, to Deen’s credit, he’s a lovable loser.

And just like Deen, the reader gets swept up in the events. The story begins in India, a land of exotic appeal—though here it mostly shows its everyday face, where profound poverty meets modernity (even the poorest souls seem to have a cell phone). Human trafficking and mass migration are as much a part of daily life as the centuries-old legends, not to mention the rampant environmental pollution.

A Thoroughly Cultural-Historical Investigation

The story of Gun Island is complex, and the Ghosh’s thoroughness is impressive across all themes he touches. It’s a curious feeling (at least for us here*) to read about love for language and homeland in a way that’s jingoistic but rather like the simple, joyful thrill of meeting a fellow countryman abroad, who, incidentally, speaks to you in the dialect your grandmother used half a century ago.

The author is just as well-versed in global warming as he is in Venice’s distant past, where our hero finally winds up in his journey across cultures—a journey that’s at times heartwarming, other times eerie.

(It’s a fascinating coincidence that, two books ago, in an entirely different genre [see Donna Leon’s Earthly Remains], the same problems came up in this identical setting.) Venice was built on wooden foundations, and believe it or not, these are now being devoured by shipworms that have appeared due to global warming. So, if you’ve yet to visit the Queen of the Seas, which is slowly sinking into herself, it’s time to hurry.

The essence of the book:

We live in a new world. No one knows where they belong anymore—neither people nor animals.

The Gunpowder Runs Out by the End

The lines of Gun Island and the fate of its characters mirror each other; the trader fleeing from the wrath of Manasa Devi, the goddess of snakes, and the Indian migrants setting out in hope of a better life share numerous parallels. However, as the story unfolds, the legend’s unraveling is increasingly overshadowed by the issue of migration, depicted with Ghosh’s empathetic understanding. (It’s worth noting that Ghosh also presents a fact-based background, tracing these events back to the colonial era.) This is Gun Island’s alpha and omega, where everything leads. But—regardless of your stance on mass migration—this is also where the book begins to lose steam.

By the end, you’ve learned all there is to know about the gun merchant, and the remaining afterthoughts simply lack impact. Deen’s romantic developments feel forced, Cinta’s fate is storybook-like, and the ultimate “grand miracle” is simply dull, despite the author’s intent to make it universally significant. But that’s only the last 50 pages; until then, everything is pretty much on point.

Rating: 7.8/10

Gun Island by Amitav Ghosh
288 pages, Hardcover
Published in 2019 by Hamish Hamilton
—
You may also be interested in:
The Year of the Runaways by Sunjeev Sahota

Her Body and Other Parties: Stories by Carmen Maria Machado – Book Review

08/31/202409/06/2021 by dr. gunga

Award-Winning Tribute to the Female Body

Why was this book nominated for a billion awards? Carmen Maria Machado’s Her Body and Other Parties has won several accolades, including the Brooklyn Public Library Literary Prize, which sounds like a significant recognition at first glance. Oh, and it also won the Lambada Literary Award. Alright, enough with the jokes—it’s actually the Lambda Award, which honors the best LGBTQ-themed books.

And here, I’d like to quickly advise the conservative and religious readers of this blog to skip this piece for the sake of their mental well-being!

Her Body and Other Parties (and Carmen Maria Machado) might just be onto something. They certainly know how to title a book.

Surreal Stories

The title, the blurb, and other elements like the Lambda Award promise a dense mix of surrealism, erotica, and sex. Predominantly lesbian sex. Surrealism is present in all but one of the stories, while overt erotica is mostly found in the first one, and the amount of lesbian sex decreases as you progress through the book, eventually fading away completely.

Everyday Female Desires and Strange Mysteries

What you do find in the stories of “Her Body and Other Parties” are the unvarnished depictions of everyday female desires, but even more so, various trauma situations (abuse, body image issues, depression), which are always accompanied by some sort of bizarre mystery that keeps you hooked on the stories: What will happen if the ribbon around the woman’s neck is removed? Will the girl survive the apocalypse? Whose child is that, anyway? And so on. The most interesting thing is that these bizarre situations often serve as a mere framework for the story, but the reasons or meanings behind them are almost never revealed. So, after finishing a story, it continues to linger in your mind. Very clever.

Mostly. There are also some stories that are just strange in a head-scratching way. Except for the pseudo-Special Victims Unit one (Especially Heinous), starring the ghost-seeing Stabler and the unstable Benson. This creation, being a collage of story fragments and casually thrown-in half-sentences, is nearly impossible to interpret within the confines of the known universe.

Beauty and Female Sensitivity

Carmen Maria Machado’s writing is, however, undeniably beautiful and consistently high-quality. I’d even add that it’s written with a female sensitivity, which usually doesn’t imply a positive trait, often leading to excessive sentimentality. But that’s not the case here. And there you have it—an explanation for all the awards and nominations.

The two exceptions that break the overall smoothness of Her Body and Other Parties interestingly disrupt the two most powerful stories: The Resident, which exudes a Stephen King-like ominousness from start to finish—possibly a reflection of the author’s childhood trauma, as she deliberately places her monogram in the text—is ruined by an overdone, out-of-place ending.

And The Husband Stitch contains some forced authorial instructions on how it should be read: “If you are reading this story out loud, make the sound of the bed under the tension of train travel and lovemaking by straining a metal folding chair against its hinges…”

Certainly, dear Carmen! Certainly!

Rating: 7.6/10

Her Body and Other Parties: Stories by Carmen Maria Machado
248 pages, Paperback
Published in 2017 by Graywolf Press

Earthly Remains by Donna Leon – Book Review

08/31/202409/03/2021 by dr. gunga

Earthly Remains by Donna Leon – Book Cover

Average Crime in an Enjoyable Style

The American author lived in Venice for thirty years and began writing her crime series set in the city and its surroundings, featuring Inspector Brunetti, in 2003. The series is now at its 30th installment. Maria Vergine!* The cruel Hungarian** publisher, for some reason, skipped over more than half of the books in the translation process—sometimes leaving out as many as five in a row! So, for example, you might be surprised to learn that by the time Earthly Remains was published, Guido Brunetti had already been promoted to Chief Inspector! And you missed it! And how on earth did Vice-Questore Patta***, Brunetti’s utterly unbearable boss, not manage to block this promotion? Perhaps Signorina Elettra, the charming but mysterious secretary with her own connections, had a hand in it? We’ll never know!

What we do know is that Donna Leon’s novels can be placed in the same category as Simenon’s Maigret stories. (Though they are much more enjoyable.) Mostly, they involve average crimes with everyday culprits, nothing particularly flashy. However, they provide a thorough depiction of the environment and society, offering deep insights into Italian daily life, national character, and cuisine! (Yum—here’s yet another book series that will leave you constantly hungry while reading.) And, of course, Venice.

Let Me Move in With the Brunettis!

Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski – Book Review

08/31/202408/25/2021 by dr. gunga

Sword of Destiny by Andrzej Sapkowski – Book Cover

Monster Slaying in a Not-So-Original World

The best thing about the second installment of Sapkowski’s Witcher series is that you can decide whether you want to continue reading right after the first two short stories. This is because the very first story in Sword of Destiny is, to put it bluntly, the weakest one, almost like an unintentional parody of itself. The second story, on the other hand, is the best, tying for first place with the last one.

Andrzej Sapkowski’s method remains the same as in the first book (see The Last Wish). The Witcher roams a rather unoriginal fantasy world, encounters various monsters and mythical creatures, while a cheering crowd behind him urges him to chop them up as quickly as possible. And the Witcher? Well, sometimes he chops them up, and sometimes he doesn’t.

Wait, Is This a Children’s Story?!

Unfortunately, the fairy-tale stereotypes once again drag Sapkowski’s book down. In the stories of Sword of Destiny, dragons hoard treasures in their caves. Okay, that was fine in The Lord of the Rings, but a few decades have passed since then. Even if we accept the premise that a dragon, this mindless beast, would first rob a few wealthy citizens before devouring them, then pack the stolen jewels into a purse with its paws—excuse me, claws—and haul them back to its cave, then sort them by carat value with a magnifying glass perched on its snout… it’s still a bit much to swallow that this monster can speak. And eloquently as fuck, at that…

Knife by Jo Nesbo – Book Review

08/31/202408/22/2021 by dr. gunga

How to Write a Harry Hole Novel

What’s the formula behind every Harry Hole novel? (Including Knife). It’s made up of four elements:

1. Harry’s EPIC struggle with alcohol.

2. During the investigation, someone close to him gets killed. (You wouldn’t want to be his colleague, trust me.)

3. A dizzying mix-up of suspects that leaves you in a daze.

4. A style that’s far more fluid and lively compared to typical Scandinavian crime novels, making it nearly impossible to put down.

The Recipe Fails

This formula worked pretty well up until the previous novel (The Thirst), but that’s where it all fell apart. It became impossible to take seriously the endless stream of obvious red herrings, each one blatantly screaming “fake” from a mile away. And they really were just that—fake. Then, of course, another one of Harry’s hunches would come along, and the whole cycle would start over again.

The Lost Man by Jane Harper – Book Review

08/27/202408/16/2021 by dr. gunga

The Lost Man by Jane Harper - Book Cover

Family Drama in Scorching Heat

To start, it’s helpful to know that Australia is scorching hot. It’s a wonder half the continent hasn’t caught fire. Oh, wait—it already has. Much like The Lost Man, Jane Harper’s first novel, The Dry, was set against this intense heat. However, The Dry turned out to be a fairly average crime novel (despite trying to present itself as more) and left me questioning whether I should bother reading anything else by her.

But of course, I couldn’t resist. (Damn curiosity!) And in the end, I didn’t regret it. The Lost Man is definitely an improvement over its predecessor, though for a long time, you might not even realize you’re reading a crime novel—it’s unclear if a crime has even taken place—or a leisurely paced family drama. In reality, it’s a bit of both. Regardless of what it turns out to be, I can imagine that the slow pacing might eventually deter some readers.

Australia’s Loneliest Man Investigates

The middle brother, who runs the family’s vast property far away from anything—except the desert—is found dead in the middle of nowhere. He left his car behind. Now, anyone who abandons their car in a place where 45°C (113°F) isn’t considered too hot is he is done for. Nathan, the LONELIEST PERSON in all of Australia and the estranged brother of the victim, doesn’t exactly conduct an investigation; like the rest of the family, he’s just trying to process the tragedy.

The Late Show by Michael Connelly – Book Review

08/27/202408/13/2021 by dr. gunga

The Late Show by Michael Connelly – Book Cover

Reneé Ballard – The Appointed Successor of Harry Bosch

Good old Harry Bosch, our favorite detective (see The Concrete Blonde), and arguably the lead of the best crime series I’ve ever read, has retired. He’s gotten old, poor guy. Reneé Ballard, the protagonist of The Late Show, seems to be Connelly’s chosen successor for the Hollywood Division.

A quick Google search reveals that in the next Ballard story, the two crimefighters will team up. I don’t know, maybe Bosch, who has always had a soft spot for women, takes Ballard under his wing, or something like that—after all, he’s well into grandpa age now. But let’s leave that as a surprise. (Ah, I’m sure he’ll charm her.)

But fortunately, we won’t be left feeling Bosch’s absence for too long, because Ballard’s approach, dedication, and outsider status remind us a lot of Bosch. Plus, Ballard is pretty sexy too. (Sure, Bosch is sexy too, but just a bit less so.)

We overlook Ballard’s flaws just as we did Bosch’s, or rather, we overlook the author’s obsession with the same basic setup that he couldn’t quite let go of in The Late Show either: the lone wolf who follows their own path, constantly clashing with at least five superiors, with both sides making life difficult for each other at every opportunity.

Tripwire by Lee Child – Book Review

08/27/202408/07/2021 by dr. gunga

Major Reacher in Top Form!

Attention Reacher fans! This installment of the series stands out in two key ways from the major’s usual (though hardly ordinary) adventures.

First: Our protagonist is in the best shape of his life in Tripwire. He’s packing in 10,000 calories a day and has gained a whopping 20 kilos of muscle. (He’s digging like a machine, after all.) So, woe to any villains who cross his path! Except, of course, if nature calls while he’s dealing with one. Along with all those calories, he’s downing a full ten liters of mineral water every day. (By the 23rd book in the series, Past Tense, there’s still no sign of overworked kidneys, so we can assume the major kicked this harmful habit.)

But does it bother me one bit if he might have a few, let’s say, accidents now and then? Not in the slightest! I’ve made it clear before that Major Reacher is my ultimate role model (see: Die Trying).

Major Reacher in Love!

Second: Our favourite detective is in love! And this isn’t some fleeting infatuation that anyone might experience over a pretty face or a shapely leg. It’s a long-standing emotion reawakened. It’s certainly unusual to see the major, who’s used to women falling at his feet, intoxicated by his rugged charm (which, let’s face it, is totally understandable), showing such vulnerability.