Deadly Class, a comic series with one of the most unbelievable storylines and some of the most downright unlikeable protagonists of all time, kicks off its eighth volume, Never Go Back, with an unusual opening: a lenghty drug trip.
Pls, Don’t Mess With Me, Mr. Remender!
If your protagonist is unreliable, unpredictable, unstable, a chronic backstabber, and endlessly whiny, a drug-induced hallucination is probably the last thing that will make them more relatable to your readers. Drug trips are like listening to someone describe their dreams in excruciating detail: nobody gives a damn except the dreamer. In fact, the more they share, the more irritating it becomes.
The entire first quarter of Never Go Back, which corresponds to issue 36, might as well be flushed down the toilet as a complete waste of ink.
Of course, if only a quarter of Never Go Back were just wasted space, you could count yourself lucky…
Never Go Back – To Common Sense
Before Rick Remender sat down to sketch out the plot for the eighth volume, he probably hacked up a good chunk of phlegm, spat it as high as he could, and then stepped underneath it. Only after that did he begin writing…
Marcus and his love interest, Maria, come to the conclusion, after some pondering, that having dealt with most of their enemies, they really have only one option left: to return to the very place they had desperately tried to escape—the King’s Dominion Atelier of the Deadly Arts.
Yes, the same place where they’re public enemies number one and two.
But if they’re going back, why the hell did they leave in the first place? Oh, right—because they’d have been killed if they stayed? Got it. Uh, wait a minute.
Never Go Back – Just Walk in Circles
This is the point where you start to wonder what on earth was going through Rick Remender’s head at this point. “Never go back?” he might have mused. “Nah, let’s go back!”
Or maybe he remembered that the title of his comic series is Deadly Class, after all.
And perhaps he thought that Bobblehead Master Lin, who resembles a seahorse preserved in formaldehyde, would, of course, warmly embrace his prodigal lambs—after finishing up his bile-spewing.
Sure, why not.
The only thing he didn’t consider was that Deadly Class is at its weakest when set in the actual school.
And so begins the tiresome slog once more—the endlessly dull Who’s the Coolest in School game, perfectly exemplified by Shabnam, the nerdy loser, holding a top spot; after all, he’s leading some ridiculous point system.
Deadly Class as a Concept is Broken
Think about any military training program that prepares people to kill—from elite commandos to ninjas. Strict discipline, dedication, constant drills.
Now compare that to Deadly Class. These students wouldn’t even be able to hit the target. They’re perpetually high on drugs. If they’re not, they’d still miss due to withdrawal-induced trembling. Or they’d just shoot their own teammates, since student-on-student violence is an everyday occurrence at the King’s Dominion. Some even bring axes and katanas to the cafeteria—presumably to deal with their cereal.
And what kind of order could there possibly exist in a school where students regularly sneak out in groups to attend rock concerts?
Who could focus on studying under these circumstances?
I’d bet half of these assassin trainees are failing all their classes and only scrape by on their teachers’ leniency.
Never Go Back – Unless You’re Saya
Not in every chapter, but in about every second one, Rick Remender manages to pull off a section that’s not entirely nonsensical. Or maybe it is entirely nonsensical, but it still somehow works.
In Never Go Back, as usual, that’s thanks to Saya. You’re obviously not the only one who’s reminded of Quentin Tarantino’s Kill Bill: Vol. 1 by the Tokyo adventures of the Japanese sword-wielding girl.
Yakuza, absurdly over-the-top violence, sheer madness, revenge—and, of course, a katana.
I can’t quite remember why Kenji s so pissed at his little sister, but if it’s because their family sent Saya to the King’s Dominion instead of him, then he’s wasting his breath. The school is good for nothing except turning promising young criminals into drugged-up, sociopathic, bloodthirsty lunatics. And Kenji managed to achieve that all on his own.
Saya finally does something this comic has been crying out for: she ensures that at least one scumbag bastard pays for their sins.
And the fact that she heads back to the most abominable institution in the American education system—the King’s Dominion School of the Deadly Arts—is forgivable only because, given her family circumstances, even a filthy, rat-infested leper colony would seem like an improvement.
Rating: 6.9/10
Deadly Class, Volume 8 – Never Go Back by Rick Remender – Wes Craig
128 pages, Paperback
Published in 2019 by Image Comics
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Reviews of the earlier volumes in the series:
#1 – Reagan Youth
#7 – Love Like Blood